In India, there’s a certain silence that falls when the word “cancer” is mentioned. It’s as if the disease carries with it not just fear but also shame. For many, it’s still considered a taboo topic, spoken about in hushed tones or not at all. But Amit, true to his nature, wasn’t one to shy away from anything—not even cancer.
When Amit was diagnosed, the reactions were mixed. Some people expressed their concern, while others avoided talking about it altogether. There were whispers behind closed doors, people saying it was best not to mention the word around him, as if acknowledging it would make things worse. But Amit had no time for that. He tackled his illness with the same fierce spirit and humor he had always shown.
One day, a family friend came to visit Amit. He/She (for obscurity) sat awkwardly, unsure of what to say. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, he/she said, “I didn’t know if I should visit... I didn’t want to disturb you.” Amit smiled and replied, “Disturb me? I’m the same Amit. Let’s talk like we always do. I could use some company.” And that’s how he changed the entire mood of the conversation. With Amit, cancer was just another challenge, not something to be ashamed of or hidden away.
But that’s not the case for everyone. In India, cancer still carries a stigma. Some people think it’s contagious, while others feel uncomfortable discussing it, believing it brings bad luck. This mindset can often make patients feel isolated or like they’re facing their illness alone. Amit didn’t let this happen. He was open about his condition, often joking about it to put others at ease, and in doing so, he showed everyone that cancer doesn’t change who you are.
Through his journey, we learned a few important things about interacting with someone battling cancer:
Do's
- Listen – Let them share their thoughts and feelings at their own pace. Don’t force conversations about their illness unless they bring it up.
- Be normal – Treat them as you always have. Share funny stories, talk about your day, and include them in normal conversations.
- Offer help – Whether it’s running errands, cooking a meal, or just sitting with them, offer support in practical ways.
- Be patient – Understand that they may not always want to talk or have visitors, and that’s okay.
- Respect their strength – Acknowledge their bravery without overpraising or pitying them. Sometimes a simple “I admire how you’re handling this” is enough.
Dont's
- Don’t avoid them – Silence and distance can make them feel more isolated. Even a simple check-in can mean a lot.
- Don’t make assumptions – Don’t assume you know how they feel or what they need. Let them guide the conversation.
- Don’t offer unsolicited advice – While it’s natural to want to help, avoid giving medical or treatment advice unless they ask for it.
- Don’t treat them differently – They are still the same person. Don’t let the disease become the center of every conversation.
- Don’t use negative language – Avoid saying things like “I can’t imagine what you’re going through” or “This must be so hard.” Focus on their strength and positivity instead.
Amit’s journey reminded us all that cancer isn’t something to be feared or hidden. It’s a fight, but it’s one that people can face with courage, humor, and strength—just like Amit did. And with the right support, those facing the illness don’t have to feel alone or stigmatized.